Well, you can’t really act on these feelings that you’re having because you know the response that you’re going to get. 

I think what you need to is focus your attention elsewhere.  I know that sounds MUCH easier to do than in reality… but the truth is that when those emotions come up, you need to remind yourself of the fact that no matter how hard you try… that these straight guys are straight. 

See, it’s easy as a gay man to convince ourselves that straight men just “don’t know what they’re missing” and that if they gave us a chance, they would “realize that maybe they could be with a man.”  This is NO different than a straight woman telling herself that she can date us because we just “haven’t found the right woman.”  Sound familiar?  So let me ask you this… how easy is it to change your sexuality?  I know this answer and I’m thinking you do as well.

Why is that important to think about?  Because you’re asking for a straight man to “expand his horizons”… even if it’s just mentally… meaning that you are telling yourself in your head that there’s a chance… when in reality… there isn’t a chance. 

It’s natural to be attracted to people that we think are hot/funny/smart… all that good stuff… so what you’re doing is perfectly natural, but you need to re-wire your thinking to realize that straight guys are straight… that even tho you WANT to date someone just like that… that trying to date a straight man just won’t work.  Sure, there are some guys that are questioning their sexuality that may be date worthy…but let’s be honest… until someone has come to terms with their sexuality, they’re a bit unstable in the dating world.  It’s not a good or bad thing… but just IS the way it is…

So you need to remind yourself of those things… honestly… to see that while that attraction is definitely normal, there’s really nothing you can do about it.  Now if one of your best friend’s brothers comes out and starts talking about how he’s gay… then revisit the subject… but until then… see them as hands off.  I know you mean well and want a smoking hot boyfriend to call your own (who doesn’t?!) but you’re only setting yourself up for failure, unfortunately.

So what are some things you can do?  Well, as I’ve said… start thinking about those things when you see them.  That will help.  Another thing?  Don’t be in a position where you’re around them very much.  I know, that totally sucks… but limiting your exposure to them until you can get your hormones in place will definitely help. 

I remember being REALLY attracted to one of my best friend’s brothers.  He was STUNNINGLY hot and no matter when I went over there, I’d always find him doing the lawn shirtless and sweaty.  She never knew that I thought he was hot, but I started to just ignore him… like I would say hello and walk past right away and not really check him out…why?  Because I knew he was unavailable.  It just didn’t make sense.  But I could have stared at that chest all day… and when he’d walk in… he would always just lay around in just his shorts… and it would DRIVE ME NUTS… so a few times, I ended up leaving… And the whole reason?  I knew that I was having a hard time controlling my feelings for him…even tho I KNEW he was straight… I still couldn’t control myself.  It took me some time, but I finally started putting him in the right light… where I started to see him as just one of my best friend’s brothers. 

That’s really the only advice that I can give.  I know how you’re feeling… intimately…because let’s face it… there’s a lot of hot, straight men out there.  But something else to consider… there are quite a few SMOKING hot gay men too! ;-)

I hope that helps… let me know if you need anything else!

kev